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Mark Adams: Are we gluten-free this week? Yes, we're gluten-free. Then why the hell is she having 'SunChips'? (00:03:43)

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Teacher: I see where he got it.
Erasmus: Don't you think this is the pot calling the kettle black?
Paul: I did notice the word "felching" on your classroom wall which I thought was inappropriate in a classroom.
Teacher: That is "felting".
Paul: Oh, yeah. That makes more sense. Felching isn't until middle school. (01:01:04)

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Lawyer: Now, they can foreclose on Friday. Come hell or high water, be at the bank in Childress on Thursday. Knowing them f-ers, they will close early.
Toby: We'll be there.
Lawyer: Oh, and Toby, the trust needs to be managed by a bank. You really wanna cover your tracks? You get Texas Midland to handle this trust.
Toby: [Nods "okay"] (00:48:23)

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Toby: How much you making on this deal?
Lawyer: Not as much as I'm risking.
Tanner: Why do it, then?
Lawyer: You know, they loaned your mother the least they could. Just enough to keep your mama poor on a guaranteed loan. Thought they could swipe her land for $25,000. That's just so arrogant, it makes my teeth hurt. To see you boys pay these bastards with their own money? [Chuckles] Well, if that ain't Texan, I don't know what is. (00:47:40)

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Will: [To Stella] I'm sorry. I don't wanna go. All I want is to be with you... I need you to be safe from me... Could you close your eyes? I love you... so much. [Leaves] (01:46:16 - 01:47:00)

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Clerk: The hamster hammock is a top seller... Then we have the seesaw, nibblers and the pet playhouse.
Man: There's no room for the pet playhouse.
Clerk: You know, it's funny. You don't strike me as a hamster person.
Man: Well, I am.
Clerk: You seem more like a reptile person... Snakes. That's it. You're a snake person.
Man: Snakes eat hamsters... You know, you remind me a lot of my mother.
Clerk: Really?
Man: Yeah. She wasn't a good listener and she never knew when to shut the f - up. (00:51:41)

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Man: Is there a problem?
Billy: I got a job for you.
Man: Good.
Billy: I think you're gonna like it. It complements that hobby of yours.
Man: What's the job?
Billy: I'd like you to kill Santa Claus. (00:29:45)

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Billy: You know, I've never lost a science competition. Did you know a circuit is only as good as its ground?
Christine: Billy, I-I thought that your science proj-
Billy: Twelve-volt car battery. Might not kill you, but it'll make your teeth chatter. You're gonna return the First-Place ribbon and tell how you were unfairly helped with the train project. You cheated. You don't deserve to win. Am I being clear? [Christine nods]. Get her out of here. (00:17:22)

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Mr. Butler: I'm sorry to tell you this, but your son threatened me.
Mr. Ward: What did he say, exactly?
Mr. Butler: Well, he uh... just he was using a book as a metaphor.
Mr. Ward: So, you came here to tell me my son...what? Assaulted you with a poem? (00:41:13)

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Ellis: We're not just stealing. We're leaving a message. (00:20:03)

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Paul: See, history is either a lie or a bore... History can't compete with video games, YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, Snapchat, Vine, Kik, Burn Note, Whisper, Yik Yak, Skype, Tinder, Grinder, texting, sexting, porn, and that shitty, shitty, shitty orgy of mind numbing mistake called Hollywood. You see, kids, history can't compete. History is over. Everything is happening in this second. (00:36:41)

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Gigi: You know what this is, Alex? For every gallon of crude oil sucked from this Earth comes 15 gallons of...? Water. No good to any living thing.
Alex: What's wrong with it?
Gigi: Besides the fact that it's radioactive?
Alex: You're joking.
Gigi: Is cancer a joke?
Alex: What's it doing here?
Gigi: Evaporating, percolating, and it travels. (00:08:26)

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Gigi: Gentlemen, I've come to find that the Devil has a name. If you're growing apples, you're in Eden. Almonds, you're east, central California to be exact. There are 53 different types of nuts in the world. He was one of them. (00:04:12)

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Gigi: The devil's not the devil unless he takes his due. (01:21:18)

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Fred: You know how much money they made poisoning my water? $2.1 billion - and that's just one year
Aegis: Over 10 years?
Fred: At least
Aegis: Hmm... I'd say they owe you at least one year. (00:33:25)

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[Tyler enters the room and sees a woman bound and gagged on the floor, making mumbled screams].
Don: Bud, listen to me. I'd never hurt anyone. This woman and I are having an affair. We're a little kinky, that's all. I know, I know, this is a lot for you to take in, but your mother knows all about this. She and I-
Kassi: Are you serious with this bullshit? (01:33:30)

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Tyler: The truth is, bad things happen to good people. Our only defense is to come together like we've done today. That's what my dad taught me through how he lived. Let's remember how he impacted our lives. (01:43:40)

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Woman on TV: So, you're saying that they know what they're doing?
Female Expert: On some basic level, yes. And they're almost screaming at themselves to stop, but they can't. (00:14:00)

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Jennifer Davis: We're starting to see some instances of groups of people - well, groups of people fighting back. We do not encourage this. Certainly, if you are attacked, you should defend yourself. But what we have seen so far, the best way to survive, to avoid infection, to avoid being a part of spreading the infection, is to just completely avoid contact. Find a place to hide and stay there. Hopefully, it won't have to be for too long. (00:08:23)

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Announcer: Major cities in complete chaos! Infected people are extremely dangerous! We're seeing bleeding from the eyes, screaming. We're also seeing cannibalism. The virus is being transmitted through the blood, primarily through the bites, scratches. Uh, the amount of... [Steady tone - TV goes off air] (00:06:32)

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