John McClane: Oh, you're in charge. Well, I got news for you, Dwayne. From up here, it doesn't look like you're in charge of jack shit.
Dwayne Robinson: You listen to me, you little asshole.
John McClane: Asshole"? I'm not the one who just got butt-fucked on national TV, *Dwayne*.
John McClane: A hundred million terrorists in the world and I gotta kill one with feet smaller than my sister.
John McClane: Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker.
Chief Dwayne: Now you listen to me, mister. I don't know who the hell you think you are or what you're doing, but you just destroyed a building! Now we do not want your help, is that clear? We don't want your help. I've got a 100 people down here and they are covered with glass!
John McClane: Glass? Who gives a shit about glass?
[John throws a body onto a cop car to get his attention.]
John McClane: Welcome to the party, pal!
[McClane is trying to call the police for help.]
Policewoman: Sir, this line is for emergencies only.
John McClane: No fucking shit, lady! Do I sound like I'm ordering a pizza?!
John McClane: Come out to the coast, we'll get together, have a few laughs.
Harry Ellis: Hans, bubby, I'm your white knight.
Hans Gruber: I must have missed 60 Minutes. What are you saying?
Harry Ellis: You know that guy that's fucking things up upstairs? I can give him to you.
Terrorist: You won't hurt me
John McClane: Oh yeah? Why not?
Terrorist: Because you're a policeman. There are rules for policemen.
John McClane: Oh Yeah? So my captain keeps telling me.
Hans Gruber: "Now I have a machine gun. Ho. Ho. Ho."
Hans Gruber: And what idiot put you in charge?
Holly Gennero: You did. When you murdered my boss.
Terrorist: They're using artillery on us!
Hans Gruber: You idiot. It's not the police. It's him.
Theo: Oh my god, the quarterback is toast!
Hans Gruber: I'm going to count to three, there will not be a four. Give me the code.
Holly Gennero McClane: After all your posturing, all your little speeches, you're nothing but a common thief.
Hans Gruber: I am an exceptional thief, Mrs. McClane. And since I'm moving up to kidnapping, you should be more polite.
Hans Gruber: "And when Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer." Benefits of a classical education.
Hans Gruber: When they touch down, we'll blow the roof, they'll spend a month sifting through rubble, and by the time they figure out what went wrong, we'll be sitting on a beach, earning twenty percent.
John McClane: So that's is what this is about, Hans? A fucking robbery?
Hans Gruber: Put down the gun.
John McClane: Why'd you have to nuke the whole building, Hans?
Hans Gruber: Well, when you steal $600, you can just disappear. When you steal 600 million, they will find you, unless they think you're already dead.
Joseph Takagi: You want money? What kind of terrorists are you?
Hans Gruber: Who said we were terrorists?
Hans Gruber: This time John Wayne does not walk off into the sunset with Grace Kelly.
John McClane: That was Gary Cooper, asshole.
Answer: The most likely reason is that the two versions have been "panned and scanned" differently. In the original theater version, both things are on screen at the same time at opposite sides of the screen. In one version, the person who did the TV P&S (not someone associated with the making of the film) chose to move the view from one side of the original picture to the other, showing the terrorist, while the person who did the VHS P&S stayed focused on one side of the frame, only showing Al.
Myridon