Otis: Sssssmokin.
Nick Persons: Oh Damn! Boy Didn't you hear what I just said?
Lindsey Kingston: Ooh, you just swore.
Nick Persons: Your damn right I swore, that's about $400 dollars worth of damage to my new car.
Lindsey Kingston: That's twice! Now you have to put two dollars in the swear jar.
Alexandra 'Nightingale' Morgan: If we're lucky, the zombie plague will end up as a footnote in the history books. No worse than aids or bubonic plague.
Emily Friehl: Don't... you'll ruin it.
Romy White: Why am I the only one who sees how great I am?
Maria Kelly: Oh, and when you go out with a guy be sure he has a brother or a friend who is single before you call me.
Narrator: When you're a gay man, you have to feel good about yourself when a urologist says, 'Yeah. I pick you.'.
Pepe the Prawn: Those of you who have Dark Side of the Moon, press play now.
Sarah: They had to cut me out of the snow with scissors.
Nick Naylor: The message Hollywood needs to send out is 'Smoking Is Cool!'.
Tracy Stokes: I think I just swallowed Nemo.
Marienne Hotchkiss: Dance is a very powerful drug Mr. Keane. If embraced judiciously, it can exorcise demons, access deep seated emotions and color your life in joyous shades of brilliant magenta that you never knew existed. But, one must shoulder its challenges with intrepid countenance if one is ever to reap its rewards.
June: It is impossible to say Goodbye to someone you love. It is easier to say 'See ya Later... may be in heaven'.
Claire Colburn: Life cannot be so cruel that we don't deserve to be together... to eat.
Rose Feller: Was I unfriendly?
Simon Stein: No. Not compared to, say, Stalin.
Majeed: I was the funniest one in school... and the funniest one in explosives training.
Crystal Falls: I probably would have ended up with a football player if I hadn't met you. And I'm not gonna lie - you've really kept it interesting, but I'm done.
Billy: What the fuck are you talking about?
Sir Nicholas: What queer finery he wears.
Geoff Tipps: I'm not queer, don't bum me.