Quotes from Sally Field movies and TV shows

Aunt May: What happened to your face? It's filthy
Peter Parker: It is?
Aunt May: Yeah!
Peter: Oh yeah, I was cleaning, the chimney.
Aunt May: We have no chimney.
Peter Parker: Whaaat?

Aunt May: I once told you that secrets have a cost. The truth does too.

Celeste Whitman: Are you going to kiss me now?
Captain Mike Turner: No.
Celeste Whitman: Well then let's get the hell out of here.

Robert Doob: What are you gonna do? Shoot me?
Karen McCann: You broke into my house with the intent to do me bodily harm. The law says I have the right to protect myself.
Robert Doob: What? You want me to say I'm sorry? It could have been anybody. I don't even remember what she looked like. It's nothing personal.
Karen McCann: She was seventeen years old. She was five-foot two. She had brown eyes. Her name was Julie. She was my daughter.
Robert Doob: She was a great f-f-f-fuck.

Karen McCann: Why don't you offer him a candy bar and maybe he will confess?

Karen McCann: And you can't catch him! You can't punish him! You can't protect anyone else! You're completely useless.

Sassy: Does the cat always have to be the brains of the operation? Beauty and brains. I never cease to amaze myself.

Chance: It's a thing of beauty when Chance is on duty.
Sassy: Speaking of doody, I thought I smelled something.

Shadow: Sassy, do you hear a truck?
Sassy: No, Shadow. I see a truck.

Mary Todd Lincoln: No one is loved as much as you by the people. Don't waste that power.

Mary Todd Lincoln: Seward can't do it; you must. Because if you fail to acquire the necessary votes, woe unto you, sir. You will answer to me.

Mrs. Doubtfire: I hope you don't mind me being a tad rude, but... How was he? You know, on a scale of 1 to 10?
Miranda: Well, that part was always... Okay.
Mrs. Doubtfire: Just okay? Well, he was probably a Casanova compared to poor old Winston.
Miranda: What was the matter with Winston?
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh dear, Winston's idea of foreplay was "Effie, brace yourself."

Miranda: What happened?
Mrs. Doubtfire: He was quite fond of the drink. It was the drink that killed him.
Miranda: How awful. He was an alcoholic?
Mrs. Doubtfire: No, he was hit by a Guinness truck.

Miranda: Hello, are you calling in response to the ad?
Daniel: Uh-huh
Miranda: Tell me, who was your previous employer?
Daniel: I was in a band, 'Severe Tire Damage'.
Miranda: In a band?
Daniel: I just want to know one thing. Are your kids well-behaved? Or do they need like, a few light slams every now and then?
Miranda: Umm, I'll have to get back to you.

Daniel: Well, let's take a little vacation together with the kids, as a family - get you away from work. You're a different person. You really are. You're great.
Miranda: Oh, Daniel, our problems would be waiting for us right here when we got back.
Daniel: Well, we'll move, and maybe our problems won't follow us.
Miranda: Daniel, please don't joke.
Daniel: OK.
Miranda: Yeah. It's just that we've grown apart. We're different. We have nothing in common.
Daniel: Sure we do. We love each other. Come on, Miranda, we love each other... Don't we?
Miranda: I want a divorce.

Edna Spalding: I don't care what it takes. I don't care if it kills me. I don't care if it kills you. I'm not going to give up. And if the two of you do, you can go straight to hell.

Celeste Talbert: I never said I was the best mother in the world. Give me a little credit, will you, credit for being someone who tried... to love you the only way she knew how?
Lori Craven: I know that speech.
Celeste Talbert: You do?
Lori Craven: Yeah, it was the, uh, the Thanksgiving show, when Maggie meets Bolt's blind nephew.

Celeste Talbert: Yes. Yes. Yes. I AM guilty. Guilty of love in the first degree.

David Barnes: I was under orders.
Celeste Talbert: So - was - Hitler! Oh, no, I don't mean Hitler, I mean the other guy, the other one.
David Barnes: Himmler.
Celeste Talbert: No, no, no.
David Barnes: Hess.
Rose Schwartz: Eichmann.
David Barnes: Eichmann.

Celeste Talbert: I didn't know it was your drainpipe, I thought it was somebody else's drainpipe.
Jeffrey Anderson: Your eyes, they're burning.
Celeste Talbert: I've got the flu.
Jeffrey Anderson: No, they're burning with passion.
Celeste Talbert: You're full of shit.
Jeffrey Anderson: Of course I'm full of shit but not about that.