Kenneth Halliwell: I just want to go to the awards! I could! Look, "Joe Orton and guest." I'd behave. I wouldn't say a word, I promise.
Joe Orton: No.
Kenneth Halliwell: Why?
Joe Orton: Because it's for me. I wrote it.
Kenneth Halliwell: I gave you the title.
Joe Orton: Okay, so when they have awards for titles, you can go to that.
Peggy Ramsay: Prison gives a writer credentials.
John Lahr: Everyone else, it takes them away.
Peggy Ramsay: At moments of triumph, men can do without their wives... But sharing is what wives want.
Kenneth Halliwell: I don't understand my life. I was an only child. I lost both my parents. By the time I was 20 I was going bald. I'm a homosexual. In the way of circumstances and background I had everything an artist could possibly want. It was practically a blueprint. I was programmed to be a novelist or a playwright. But I'm not and you are! Joe, you do everything better than me! You even sleep better than me.
Kenneth Halliwell: The whole point about irrational behavior is that it is irrational.
Kenneth Halliwell: At least you can say you've sat in the same chair as T.S. Eliot.
Joe Orton: Yes, I'm never going to wipe my bum again.
Peggy Ramsay: Ken was the first wife. He did all the work and the waiting and then.
John Lahr: Well, first wives don't usually beat their husbands' heads in.
Peggy Ramsay: No. Though why I can't think.
John Lahr: So what does that make you? The second wife?
Peggy Ramsay: Better than that, dear. The widow.
Kenneth Halliwell: Can you spell?
Joe Orton: Yes, but not accurately.
Kenneth Halliwell: Writing, John, is one tenth inspiration, nine tenths.
Joe Orton: Masturbation.
Joe Orton: Have you been reading my diary?
Kenneth Halliwell: No.
Joe Orton: Why not? I would.
Kenneth Halliwell: I can't remember when you last touched my cock. Well, I can actually. It was about two years ago. Only I can't remember the actual date. Pity. I could have put it in my diary. "The last time Joe touched my cock. Grouse shooting begins"
