Baroness: Let me give you some advice. You can't care about anyone. Everyone else is an obstacle. You care about what an obstacle wants or feels, you're dead. If I cared about anyone or thing, I might have died like so many brilliant women with a drawer full of unseen genius and a heart full of sad bitterness. You have the talent for your own label. Whether you have the killer instinct is the big question.
Tong: I too wish to join this fellowship of Druun buttkickery.
Barnabas: It's not hard to lie to someone that wants to believe.
Kate Dibiasky: We have exactly six months, ten days, two hours, 11 minutes and 41 seconds, until a comet twice the size of Chicxulub tears through our atmosphere and extincts all life on Earth.
Dr. Randall Mindy: When did you do those calculations?
Kate Dibiasky: I put the moment of impact on a diet app. So, impact is when my diet ends. Only I'm not on a diet. I'm just crying five times a day.
Theodore Templeton: This is just like Bill Gates' rec room, only much smaller.
Mark Bowman: It's almost like stealing people's data and giving it to a hyper-intelligent AI as part of an unregulated tech monopoly was a bad thing.
Lucinda Krementz: The kids did this, obliterated a thousand years of Republican authority in less than a fortnight. What do they want? Freedom. Full stop.
Jimmy Crystal: Hey, One last thing. Don't you ever do nothing to make me look bad! You got that?
Buster Moon: Oh, I will never let that happen, sir!
Jimmy Crystal: You better not or I'll throw you off the roof!
Massimo Marcovaldo: You two are coming with me.
Alberto Scorfano: Which knife do I get? Huh? Huh?
Massimo Marcovaldo: You don't.
Max Mercer: Homebot, search good booby traps.
Homebot: I'm sorry, the parental controls of this system restrict the term "booby."
Max Mercer: Never mind.
Bobby O'Neill: They're planning a full-scale cyber attack. Do not screw this up.
Michael Bryce: Oh, we are definitely gonna screw this up.
Casey: This dog is killing me.
Mikey: What did the donuts do on their first date?
Strawberry: I don't know.
Mikey: They glazed into each other's eyes.
Strawberry: That's so stupid. But I can't believe I haven't heard that one.
Mikey: Well, I wrote it. You couldn't have heard. I kind of write donut jokes on the side. It's one of my many talents.
Julie: I don't have anyone I can talk to the way we used to talk.
Archie: Ready for the shit show.
Duke of Oxford: I know you want to fight, but there are other ways of doing your duty.
Alana: Fuck off, teenagers.
Nolan Booth: This whole time you were working for her?
John Hartley: Not for, with. Like partners.
The Bishop: Yeah, we're both The Bishop. Surprise.
John Hartley: There are two bishops in chess.
The Bishop: And a whole lotta pawns.
Grandmother: Things would heat up. We would quarrel. But you know, dear, you gotta have the friction to have the heat!