Morpheus: You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.
Evelyn: You were actually at Hamunaptra?
Rick: Yeah, I was there.
Evelyn: You swear?
Rick: Every damn day.
Connor: Jeez! It's a fuckin' six-shooter. Fuck!
Murphy: There's nine bodies, genius.
Connor: What the fuck were you gonna do, laugh the last three to death, Funny-Man?
Guy Fleegman: I'm not even supposed to be here! I'm just "Crewman Number Six"! I'm expendable! I'm the guy in the episode who dies to prove how serious the situation is! I've gotta get outta here!
Russell Franklin: Just what the hell did you do to those sharks?
Dr. Susan McCallister: Their brains weren't large enough to harvest sufficient amounts of the protein complex. So we violated the Harvard Compact. Jim and I used gene therapies to increase their brain mass, a larger brain means more protein. As a side effect the sharks got smarter.
Janice Higgins: You stupid bitch!
Ivana Humpalot: My name is Ivana. Ivana Humpalot.
Austin Powers: Excuse me?
Ivana Humpalot: Ivana Humpalot.
Austin: And I want a toilet made out of solid gold, but it's just not in the cards now, is it?
Tyler Durden: The first rule of fight club: You don't talk about fight club. The second rule of fight club: You do NOT talk about fight club.
Kelly Scott: [On the phone.] Thank you, it's so rewarding to imagine my tax dollar finding its way to you, you fuckshit!
Hector Cyr: You are a saucy flirt.
Buliwyf: Lo, there do I see my father. 'Lo, there do I see.
Herger the Joyous: My mother, and my sisters, and my brothers.
Buliwyf: Lo, there do I see.
Herger the Joyous: The line of my people.
Edgtho the Silent: Back to the beginning.
Weath the Musician: Lo, they do call to me.
Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan: They bid me take my place among them.
Buliwyf: In the halls of Valhalla.
Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan: Where the brave.
Herger the Joyous: May live.
Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan: ...Forever.
Qui-Gon Jinn: You must have Jedi reflexes if you race pods.
[Jar Jar tries to grab a piece of fruit with his tounge, but Qui-Gon catches it.]
Qui-Gon Jinn: Don't do that again.
Capt. James West: Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.
Christmas Jones: Doctor Jones. Christmas Jones. And, no jokes. I've heard them all.
James Bond: I don't know any doctor jokes.
Val Resnick: The problem with kicking a Chow's ass is an hour later you wanna do it again.
Nick Chen: Beef intestine noodle?
Danny Wallace: Uh, no.
Nick Chen: You wanna be Chinese, you gotta eat the gross stuff.
Mitsuo Katagiri: Godzillaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Bobby Chicago: Is this considered interfering with a police investigation?
Jericho Cane: Hey... we're private citizens having a conversation with another citizen. I mean, I don't think they found a way to outlaw that... at least not yet.
Penny: This is the coolest watch. It's a radio, computer, and even a phone. Testing, testing. Brain, say something. Come in, Over.
Brain: Brain is not here. Please leave a message at the sound of the woof. Woof.
Capt. Said: What make you decide to tell me about Crystal, my main man?
Sgt. Troy Barlow: Because we're both fathers.
Capt. Said: I'm not father no more, you remember? My son is dead now. Can you think how would feel inside your heart if I bombed your daughter?
Sgt. Troy Barlow: Worse than death.
Capt. Said: That's right. Worse than death.
