Daniel Miller: Is this Heaven?
Bob Diamond: No, it isn't Heaven.
Daniel Miller: Is it Hell?
Bob Diamond: Nope, it isn't Hell either. Actually, there is no Hell. Although I hear Los Angeles is getting pretty close.
Dr. Benjamin Stone: You want to trade, the pig for the part?
Melvin the Mechanic: If you can part with the pig.
Dr. Benjamin Stone: Good.
Mickey Cohen: Hey, this conversation is beneath me.
Jimmy Dix: Ray, if we go any faster we're gonna travel back in time.
Leonardo: I'm Leonardo.
Michelangelo: I'm Michaelangelo.
Donatello: Donatello.
Raphael: I'm Raphael.
Michalangelo: All the good ones end in "O".
Detective Mastrionotti: Started in Kansas City. Couple of housewives.
Detective Deutsch: Couple days ago we see the same M.O. out in Los Feliz.
Detective Mastrionotti: Doctor. Ear, nose and throat man.
Detective Deutsch: All of which he's now missin'.
Detective Mastrionotti: Well, some of his throat was there.
Detective Deutsch: Physician, heal thyself.
Detective Mastrionotti: Good luck with no fuckin' head.
Detective Deutsch: Anyway.
Fur Protestor: Do you know how many poor animals they had to kill to make that coat?
Margo Brofman: Know how many rich animals I had to fuck to get this coat?
Fred Tate: My first grade teacher, Miss Nimvel, told Dede that I never paid attention. That I was probably retarded, and that I had a very limited future as a citizen of the United States. Then a week later, she said I should probably skip second grade, maybe even skip elementary school altogether.
George: Who presents this woman? This woman? But she's not a woman. She's just a kid. And she's leaving us. I realised at that moment that I was never going to come home again and see Annie at the top of the stairs. Never going to see her again at our breakfast table in her nightgown and socks. I suddenly realised what was happening. Annie was all grown up and was leaving us, and something inside began to hurt.
Kate Sullivan: For someone who doesn't have anything nice to say about lawyers you certainly have plenty of them around.
Lawrence Garfield: They're like nuclear warheads. They have theirs, so I have mine. Once you use them they f - - everything up.
Billie Pike: How old are you?
Willard Young: Ten. How old are you?
Billie Pike: Nine. I thought you'd be bigger.
Willard Young: Hey! Look who's talking, you midget. It just so happens I'm exactly the right size for my age. So why don't you just get lost?
Billie Pike: You don't have to go crazy. It was just an observation.