Corporal Randolph Agarn: How do you get to Fort Courage? That's easy. You take a right at the rock that looks like a bear, then a left at the bear that looks like a rock.
The Post-Modern Prometheus - S5-E5
[After spilling coffee on his lap.]
Mulder: Great, now my crotch will be up all night.
Mouse: Okay good! Okay fine.
Rick Grimes: This is how we survive. We tell ourselves that we are the walking dead.
Kelly Grayson: This is going to sound like I'm talking out my ass.
Isaac: Then please try to enunciate.
David Banner: Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
Jefferson 'Jax' Jackson: Is there anything you think about other than yourself?
Leonard Snart: Yes. Money.
Lt. Arthur Fancy: The future keeps telling us what the past was about. You make the past mean different things by the way you use the time that comes after.
Tess Silverman McLeod: You are a petty, greedy, money hungry... cattle barron.
Nick Ryan: Well then try this, we're over.
Tess Silverman McLeod: We never began.
Nick Ryan: Well fantastic, we agree.
Tess Silverman McLeod: Yeah you bet we do.
Miley Stewart: I can't believe it. I'm going out with a ninth grader! Wooo!
Robby Ray Stewart: Well, don't believe it, because I'm not letting you go. Wooo!
Elaine "The Pain" Boyack: I'm very good with children, it's just, just that Tracy Beaker's not very good at being a child.
Mr. Bennet: For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbours, and laugh at them in our turn?
Thomas Banacek: If you're not sure that it's potato borscht, there could be orphans working in the mines.
Reverend Jim: a Space Odyssey - S2-E3
Jim: Can you guess how many drugs I did?
Elaine: A lot.
Jim: Wow! Right on the nose!
Jay Pritchett: God knows I couldn't love them more, but even the Kennedy's didn't get together this often.
Kitty Forman: Oh good God, you kids switch partners more than square dancers!
Cordelia: You want I should distract him? Make with the nice-nice while you slip by?
Angel: Don't be stupid. I'm that guy and the most beautiful woman I've ever seen is making eyes at me? It's either a bachelor party or a scam.
Cordelia: What did you just call me?
Angel: I'm sorry. You're not stupid.
Cordelia: No, after that.
Dr. John Becker: The world is full of idiots, and someone needs to point it out to them or they will never know.
Multiple characters: Mouth breather.